Day 3

OCTOBER 23, 2004 BY SUSAN J

Dear Ms. Juby,

I presume you mean Linda Carter, not Linda Hamilton. And my look is much more Star Trek than Planet of the Apes.

If you would like a media escort with lower standards, just say the word. I bet Pee Wee Herman’s guy is looking for work.

Your Handler, Xena

P.S. We had a border collie once and all it did was shake. I find it alarming that you are so anxious to claim intellectual inferiority to a dog.

P.P.S. Please don’t be late to teach your class today. It’s bad enough that you posted the wrong day on your website. You are as bad with dates as you are with directions. If you don’t mind my saying so.

FILED UNDER: DEFIES CATEGORIZATION